Wednesday, August 26, 2009

The Addicting Potion of Death

Here's a story by my 10 year son, that displays his vast knowledge of fast food places, alcohol, junk food and naturopathy.



"The Addicting Potion of Death" by Adrian

One day there was this healthy old man that only ate vegetables and drinks milk. He is 92 years old, but still looking healthy. He had no wrinkles or gray hair. His 3,000 year old son told him to try a burger. But he told his son,

"No way young son."

"Why?" his son complained.

Father: "You know what son? Try a carrot."

Son: "Fine, but only if you try every single fast food place.

Father: "Ok! Ok! Ok! OK! ok !!!!!!!!!!!!!

Son: "Now give me the carrot."

Father: "Here you go."

Son: "Thank you! This is pretty tasty. Ok, BLEHH!!!!!! I was joking but now you know what you have to do. I made a potion with all the fast food places in it, too."

Father: "This can't be good."

Son: "Drink up!"

Father: "What the...is this? What is in it?"

Son: "Yep, read it."

Father: "Hold it let me drink it first. Holy Snapple, this is some good food. What is it?"

Son: "Oh, now you want to know?"

Father: "Yeah, I do so tell me!"

Son: "Hmm. Ehhh. About that..."

Father: "I said tell me."

Son: "Ok. Ok. I'll tell you. Here it goes. McDonald's, Burger King, Dairy Queen, Starbucks, Denny's, Jack in the Box, Wendy's, Duncan Donuts, iHop, Red Robin, Dollar Tree, your house, Disneyland, Disneyworld, Elitch's and one more thing - RUM!"

Father: "What?"

Son: "It's true."

Father: "Really?"

Son: "No."

Father: "Oh."

"Why would I be lying?", the son says.

"True."

Son: "ok, but you've got to admit, it's good."

Father: "Yeah, I do, but still wrong!"

Son: "Does it look like I care?"

Father: "No."

Son: "Hey, I do care."

Father: "Oh, sorry"

Son: "It's ok. So, do you like it?"

Father: "Yeah, I kinda do like it. I mean, I like it a lot."

So the old man ate fast food for a long time until he was washing his hair and he found one little teeny itty bitty grey hair. He did not see it before because of all the grease from the French fries. Then after 9 months, all of his hair turned grey. And he was getting wrinkles. On the other hand, his son was starting to get lice and ticks and all over that he started to get hunched. So all because of that, he starting eating vegetables. The old man had to stop eating this rubbish. So he sold his house, ripped all of his money to shreds.
Now he's planning on becoming a hobo for one whole year. For that's how his son got off junk food.

One year goes by.

The old man has no memory whatsoever of what has happened. This just as he planned. he wanted to start a brand new life, junk food free.

The End.

PS. It's ok to eat junk food once in a while , or, all the time if you want grey hair, wrinkles, lice, ticks and a hunch. THE END.

1 comment:

paulobrian said...

That rules. Also, I want one of those. With extra rum.