Wednesday, November 03, 2004

notes from when I was separated

Watching little Meg Ryan twirl around in "You've Got Mail" with her mommy makes me cry.

Being alone is scary. I think if I just keep on doing it maybe it gets easier.

Yeah, the loneliness can be a bitch. I cried endlessly and deeply today when Scott came to pick up the kids. I have been meditating, doing healing touch, etc. Tonight I just said screw it and I’m watching dumb movies. I guess sometimes that is ok.

I am thinking so much about relationships – why we have them, how we can have them without them being neurotic or addictive. Can we? Can I? I find I am terrified to think about being in another intimate relationship. My peace of mind, and heart, comes and goes.

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